msjessica's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- sad sexy Heavy eyes. Plump lips. Fractured schizophrenic heart. Growing love is a bullet train moving unapologetically forward in one direction. My thoughts swirl, I can’t pin anything down. Motion sickness, vertigo. What are you doing to me. What have you done to me. Oh god. Oh, God. Feelings electric pulsed through me, pushed me to pinprick precision honing in on curves and bulges divine, tsunami rush of nothing nothing nothing - peace peace peace. Then worlds collapse and I am broken and these are not things meant for me, I think, all you have to do is believe you deserve it, I think, fate can perhaps be tricked, I think. Frantic breaths before and after, from pleasure delay to fuck push the world away, all over I am small, fragile, wet and quivering, I can somehow make it through this, I think, I can make this work, I think. Convincingly enamored with my left hand while my right is reaching for a hammer to smash this all away. It feels divine to break. Like being held together is such a facade that takes so much energy, so much magic to keep all the pieces in place, broken is my true state and where you will truly know me. It is such a hidden space. Maybe you will put me back together? I think, I think, I think. 4:41 p.m. - 2018-09-25 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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