msjessica's Diaryland Diary

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nine eyes

i've never had someone make me experience my sadness so acutely.

i guess i/we've spent all this timetrying to figure out what it is. are you a mirror? are you my other half? are you........ the embodiment of everything i could have would have should have been?

i travel through my days ok but then i think of the realness that we felt and i just fucking

die

crumble

reduce

-

i would love a future but it is the least sustainable thing i've ever known. amongst addiction, mental illness etc etc encounters with this one person is my breaking point.

i want to hope for more but the knowledge/fear of how hard we break one another....

i've never known anything like this.

-

i want him and us so badly but it's suicide.

3:08 a.m. - 2013-09-05

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