msjessica's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- all wrong big day mostly of uni work. interrupted by a trip to a waterhole with that one who has me all stupidly wrapped up. walking down through rocky terrain, i am not sure on my feet at the best of times and this saw me shaking and without a hand to hold rocks and protruding branches were all I had for guidance, that and the knowledge of where his steady feet had tread. he climbed back up and jumped off the edge into dark and murky water. i sat on a rock, smoking a cigarette, wanting to swim but not willing to bare my scars and still shaken from the walk. on the drive back, the skies opened. fork lightening and rain so heavy we could hardly see the road. his housemates were there, i think all of 50 words were spoken. - all around me are beautiful couples, great romances. i feel so strung out on something but i don't know what it is. - my period is 2 weeks late. i am not pregnant, but my body is a stranger it seems. i am constantly hungry and have put on so much weight. i preferred hardly eating. preferred never never land? - apparently 6 seconds or longer of continuous eye contact without blinking signifies desire for sex or murder. that thought turns me on. - realise i lay myself out all too quickly. i am not secrets and mystery, i am just blood and guts and gore, messy, sticky goo that will stain your clothes and fingers. and nobody's interested in that for very long. 9:46 p.m. - 2012-02-12 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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