msjessica's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- never going to be easy. i was so ready with these out of the pack, air fresh cut em open blades but i guess i underestimated how i always have operated on rusty, weeks or month old thing, used up, scratching skin now with the blades i'm used to would hardly cause a scratch but now they draw blood it draws me back scares me if i was to do what i intended to do - it could be death my old strokes with these new blades - so much if i'd known this sooner glad i didn't but what now what now what now i don't want to interrupt but my force with that sharpness it always seemed hard before, but right motion with right tools jesus. - i have never seen death but seeing my muscle spill out of my flesh, my fat, seeing my insides come outside i am so torn between wanting it so badly i would eat it and just trying to be polite. 8:00 p.m. - 2012-12-31 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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